Weak Woman, Strong God
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How do you cope when life gets turned upside down by overwhelming difficulty: a scary diagnosis, depression, or disability?
After three bouts with aggressive cancer Dr. Jean Sutherland can answer this question from personal experience.
While multiple surgeries and rounds of chemotherapy have kept Dr. Jean alive, they have changed her life, appearance, and even the way she eats and speaks.
She joins the podcast to share how God has sustained her through suffering and taught her to rely on his strength in her weakness.
The Valley of the Shadow
Jean Sutherland was an internal medicine doctor with two young sons when she first heard the dreaded words, “You have cancer.” The diagnosis came as a shock for Jean, a health-conscious medical professional with no cancer in her family. The primary emotion she recalls after the diagnosis is fear.
“I had a one-year-old and a four-year-old when I was diagnosed, and I was just terrified that they were going to grow up without a mother,” Jean says.
Undergoing surgery, chemotherapy, and radiation, Jean had to stop practicing medicine for several months. She remembers anxiety welling up, often stealing the joy from her life. Nights posed the biggest challenge—the quiet hours when fears grow noisy. Jean found that hymns and Scriptures—like the ones Joni shares in her book, Songs of Suffering, brought the peace and strength she needed to endure long, difficult nights.
In the mornings Jean would type the passages that had seen her through the night and post them throughout the house—reminders of God’s love and promises:
“Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.”
Psalm 23:4
“When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.”
Isaiah 43:2
Where in life do you feel weak?
After her fight with breast cancer, Dr. Jean returned to work. She thrived seeing patients every day, taking an active part in church, and enjoying her family. Vigilant because of her first experience with cancer, she got regular scans and lived a healthy lifestyle.
When a strange sensation in the back of her mouth caught her attention, Jean went to an oral surgeon who assured her it was “highly unlikely” that she had mouth cancer; she had never smoked and had no obvious risk factors.
But the call came: “You have mouth cancer.”
Doctors performed radical surgery to remove Jean’s cancer, leaving her with terrible scars, unable to open her mouth all the way, and in excruciating pain. Her second encounter with chemotherapy left her body depleted and weak.
Overnight Jean went from living as a busy physician to a patient, home alone as her husband went to work and her children went to school—exhausted, discouraged, and bewildered. Though she had never been prone to depression, Jean fell into what she calls “a pit.” Her misery hung heavy around the clock.
“I didn’t understand what God was doing in my life,” Jean says.
“I waited patiently for the Lord;
he turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the slimy pit,
out of the mud and mire;
he set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.
He put a new song in my mouth,
a hymn of praise to our God.
Many will see and fear the Lord
and put their trust in him.”
Psalm 40:1–3
Dr. Jean loves the Psalms. She reads Psalms before turning out lights to sleep every night. Despite her physical and emotional state, Jean immersed herself in Scripture, intent on living out everything she read. For hours each day she lost herself in Old Testament stories, Proverbs, Psalms, and the stories of Jesus, listening for God through his Word.
Jean said: “I had this bracelet I wore all the time and it said, ‘With God, all things are possible.’ And I remember looking at that and just thinking, ‘but it doesn’t seem possible.’ It just didn’t seem like things would ever change. And I guess I wore that bracelet because I hung onto hope that it would change, but it just didn’t seem like it was going to.”
Finding God’s Strength in Weakness
As she leaned into God in her weakness, Jean sensed a call to return to medical practice. To renew her license she had to study—fighting through the fog of “chemo brain,” and walking to and from a nearby university library almost every day. To Jean’s surprise her body grew stronger. God also provided support to Jean through her family and members of her church.
But Jean’s trials with cancer didn’t end with mouth cancer. When an ulcer on the back of Jean’s tongue became cancerous, she faced another radical surgery. This time doctors had to remove most of her tongue and replace it with a prosthetic. Her speech, eating, and appearance were significantly and permanently altered.
“I just looked horrendous. I had all these disfiguring scars,” Jean says.
Watching people feel awkward around her—not understanding her words or getting uncomfortable because of her appearance—made it tempting for Jean to withdraw. But God provided what she needed. After her tongue cancer surgery (which happened during the pandemic lockdown), Jean’s church organized a drive-by parade to encourage her. She drew strength from her husband, sons, and friends—and of course from the Lord himself.
How might God work through you to show himself to others?
Jean didn’t get to return to medical practice after her tongue cancer treatment. Her life has changed for good. She had to let go of pieces of herself that she thought she needed: the way she used to look, the medical practice she built.
And trusting God through it she became, as she puts it, “the self that God is going to work through to show himself to other people.”
For a time Jean felt uncomfortable greeting people at church—but she’s back now, welcoming people into God’s house, pouring out the comfort and encouragement that God has given her.
Today Jean has a word for you, especially if you are facing a difficult diagnosis or other overwhelming circumstances:
- Speak the word of God out loud to yourself.
- Spend time in the word and sing hymns.
- Remember that God is faithful and give thanks in all things.
“Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”
Philippians 5:6–7
Songs of Suffering
This book is a source of comfort for anyone who needs biblical encouragement, prompting readers to seek refuge in the Lord and rejoice in his goodness.
