Walking Her Home: Learning to Say “Your Will, Not Mine” 

By |Published On: October 12, 2023|Categories: Podcast|


But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.”

2 Corinthians 12:9 
Close up portrait of Cami Lundt smiling at the camera.

Cami Lundt didn’t see it coming… news that would change her and her family forever. The baby she carried, doctors said, was “incompatible with life”… 

Facing the Unimaginable 

Cami and her husband Rich had three healthy children when they learned they had another child on the way.

Assuming the new baby girl would thrive like their first three, Cami and Rich were shocked when baby Grace was diagnosed with trisomy 13 and a Dandy-Walker brain malformation. The child, doctors told them, had a 99.9 percent chance of dying just minutes after birth.  

With Christmas coming up, Cami and Rich decided not to tell their other children. How could they process the idea of their new sibling being born only to die? But while the medical professionals gave baby Grace little chance at survival, Cami and her husband refused to give up on her life. They trusted that God had a plan for their daughter. 

Meeting Grace 

Doctors expected Grace to die. At her birth, they didn’t have a pediatrician on hand—only a team ready to provide comfort care. But God had something different in mind.

As Cami recalls: “When Grace was born, she came out crying and she looked very healthy… when they put her in my arms, she just looked perfect… We were just amazed that she made it through that first day, that first night—and two days later we took her home from the hospital.” 

The hospital sent Grace home on hospice care. Cami and Rich heard dire predictions: Grace will “fail to thrive”; she will stop breathing in the night; she will get pneumonia—her body wants to die. But day by day, Grace pulled through. With the support of a medical team willing to fight for her life, Cami dedicated herself to keeping her daughter alive. 

An Unexpected Grief 

Grace long outlived her life expectancy. And while the family appreciated every day that Grace got to be with them, the struggle to keep her alive took a toll on Cami and Rich’s marriage. 

“Our marriage, it had a cracked foundation really before Grace came along. And I didn’t realize it. I didn’t see it,” says Cami. 

When Grace was two years old, Cami and Rich reached a marriage crisis. Living in separate cities because of work, their connection faltered. And with Cami engrossed in care for Grace and the other children, Rich and Cami’s relationship had all but failed. While Cami had expected to grieve the loss of her daughter before long, she found herself shocked to be grieving what felt like the death of her marriage. 

But with help, counseling, and dedication to turn toward one another, Cami and Rich pressed ahead together. In time they not only repaired but also grew their marriage into something stronger than it had ever been… strong enough to withstand the storm to come. 

“Your will, not mine.” 

By the time Grace was four years old, she had almost died many times. Even as she survived, Cami struggled to fully trust God with Grace’s fragile, and ultimately fleeting, life. But through much prayer, pain, and life God brought new peace.

As Cami says: “I kind of came to the place where I could say, ‘She’s yours, Lord. I know that my time is limited with her and she’s yours.’” 

Shortly before her fifth birthday, God took Grace home to heaven. She died peacefully in the arms of her mom and dad. 

“When she passed, we really came together as a family and just went through that grieving process together. And I’m not going to say that it’s been perfect, because I don’t think grief is… But I’m thankful that God has been faithful to bring us through, and to keep my eyes on heaven,” says Cami. 

A Word of Encouragement 

Having seen Gracie home to heaven, Cami now wants to share the comfort and peace of God with others facing unimaginable grief. For other families caring for children with profound disabilities and health conditions, and anyone else carrying a burden that feels too heavy, Cami has a message to share. 

“God is faithful. And if we cling to him, he will get us through. God prepares us and he gives us everything we need for [each] moment,” says Cami. 

To claim God’s peace, Cami points you to the Word of God and his unfailing promises like the one found in Isaiah 26:3: “You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast, because they trust in you.”  

Walking Her Home 

Are you carrying more than you can bear? Cami shares how God’s provision, peace, and joy can be yours in even the most challenging of circumstances. 

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